Halima’s Bravery: What Ayokunle @Oddy4real Would Love
There is an ongoing GoFundMe campaign about this post. Please donate and share this link .
I wanted this to be a tweet, then I realised if I wanted people to do the action I’d be calling for at the end of this post, then they deserved some context. That was how it became a “long” post. The “why” of this post is in the last paragraph. If you skip to that paragraph and do what it says without reading anything else, you’d have served the purpose of this post.
In July 2022, someone I respect so much — Mr Moruff Adenekan — reached out to me. He said he had a big favour to ask of me. He is a kind and thoughtful man, so I was already praying I had the ability to do the favour. Then he said Oddy — Ayokunle’s popular nickname — would like to make peace with me. And he asked that I forgive him. I was shocked by the request. I didn’t see it coming. However, seeing as I was motivated to grant the favour before it was named, I was grateful it was something within my powers. I agreed immediately. We soon reconnected.
I was later to hear Mr Adenekan had reconciled Oddy with about 18 people in the same way. On Oddy’s request. I believe he’d have loved to reach many more people. If you are one of those people who felt wronged by him, understand that the rest of us he reached out to stood in gap for you. Thank you for your understanding.
Ayokunle was diagnosed of stomach cancer in March 2022 and was projected to die from the disease in about 6 months. However, I didn’t know this at the time.
One of the major reasons I had to be in Canada this December was because I was suspecting from his tweets he appeared to be signing out. I visited him on the 17th of December — just under two weeks ago. The daughter jumped on me. She was so playful you’d think we had known each other all her life. She didn’t know me from anywhere. The mum said it was unusual. This 3-year-old or so kid was making me think about the purpose of my visit beyond what I thought was meant to be me paying my respects to a brother.
I met Halima, his wife on that visit and their two children, alongside Halima’s mum who was providing support to them. By this time, Ayokunle had already defied the doctors a number of times.
The purpose of this piece is what I later realised was the other important reason for my visit; to stand with the family after his passing. I had no doubt about the clarity of that message. In fact, just two days ago, I stopped myself from sending a message to a mutual friend (of mine and Ayokunle) on Twitter about opening a GoFundMe for his family. I stopped because I wasn’t sure it was something to do whilst he was still alive. There’d have been too many questions, and I wouldn’t have been able to provide answers. I can now.
Halima has been a pillar of support to Ayo. I am glad he repeatedly said this publicly in various ways before he passed. Halima, still in her 20s or so has had to bear the reality of caring for her husband for almost two years whilst raising two children under 6. Imagine doing that alone without a terminally ill spouse, then imagine doing that with one. Their lives changed to accommodate the disease. Away from the support of family back in Nigeria seeing as they live in Canada.
Ayokunle has had his run. He had a great run. He fought cancer long and hard. Discovered at stage 4, he defied different dates and when he was ready, he passed yesterday in Edmonton. I deduced his last message to me as him signing out, he was ready to go. If you followed him on Twitter, you’d agree he’d come to accept things too, even though he never stopped dreaming and never stopped living. He lived every moment of these tough months and was never sorry for himself. Don’t be sorry for him.
Khalil, Kamilah and Halima — his two kids and wife — are here. You can be kind to them. Halima will need every help she can get. Most people will ultimately move on from this tragic news and forget about Oddy and his family — it’s not wickedness, it is life — but now that we are about him, let’s do the best we can. Let’s do the most we can for his family. After now, when you remember, do it again.
You can send money to Halima via Zenith Bank 2176856065. If you’d love to speak with her or need a Canadian account, please let me know. I can make the connection. However, understand that she is mourning at this time. Thank you for your love and understanding.
Rest In Peace Ayokunle — Oddy — Odekunle. He was one dogged soldier.
